Good Morning Everyone!
So today we have a husband and wife sharing their infertility story with us today. I was so grateful they trusted me to share their story. I promise if you share your story you can remain anonymous like most have chosen to do. These are your stories and you choose how they are told.
You have nothing ever to be ashamed of, and I understand these stories are incredibly personal and deep. If you have a story you would like to share please email me @ email@example.com. I would love to share your story like this with people who may be experiencing the same situation/emotions as you are.
This couple is beyond incredible, and any family that is experiencing infertility knows each situation is different and everyone handles things differently. This story is quite unique and shows this couples strength. What a strong and amazing couple!
Here is their story:
My wife wanted me to write our story, she think somehow I am better with words than she is, I disagree!
My wife and I were together since middle school. We basically grew up together and after college, we decided to go to community college and get married. We never really talked about how many kids, just that we would eventually have them.
We both got our generals in college but both got into careers we loved and our education stopped there. We worked hard and built a house. After years of not getting pregnant, we figured it was time to see a dr.
I am a simple person with simple means, my wife is the same. We just like to hang out and travel, so when we went looking for a doctor we were really taken back about how much these types of dr visits costed.
Long story short we found out my wife would never be able to conceive, ever.
I am not an emotional person, my wife can be but not usually. We both were surprised at how this really hit us. I would never have a son to take hunting or fishing. I would never have a daughter I could protect and threaten boyfriends for. My wife really took it hard, because she felt “it was her fault”. She felt all this guilt and felt like I would resent her.
I would never resent her for something she has no control over.
Our story is unique because fertility treatments weren’t even a possibility for us. Even if it was there would be no way we could afford any of it. Listening to other infertility stories we hear a lot of things we agree with and things we don’t.
We don’t get upset when we see pregnancy announcements. My wife loves them, she is so happy these women don’t have to feel the ways she feels. She wouldn’t wish this on her worst enemy. They don’t bother me either. Even April fools when people announce fake ones. We just don’t care, because we know a lot of people have no malicious intentions when doing those.
What pisses us off to no end is when we hear a story of a kid died due to neglect or got left in a car. Kids that are abused and abandoned. If God had allowed us to be parents to those kids they would be alive, loved, cared for. Instead, he granted a child to people who didn’t give two shits for them. That is something we cannot get over, and I hold a grudge for. I don’t hate God, I don’t know what I believe in, but I do feel a little robbed.
I am so lucky to have a partner that is always on the same page as me. Our emotions are aligned. When I am pissed about our situation so is she. We both know an adoption is always an option, once we get over this hump in our path that is a route we hope to take.
Infertility is cold, lonely and absolutely unfair!
Cayli asked me if there was one piece of advice I could share, that is to lean on your partner completely. My wife is so strong and I needed to be there for her, but I think I needed her there for me even more. Keep your head up, tread that water and be open with your partner about how you feel. Understand each other, and just get by.
We are not alone.